What do you do when you don’t have Depression but you are starting to feel like the world is on your shoulders and things are getting on top of you.
How do you get yourself out?
With all the little things in life if you don’t allow your feelings to be and process them then they fester into something much bigger and it all gets too much and you crack, you feel yourself cracking, you know you’re close to the edge, so what do you do?
Do you reach out? Yes, of course but sometimes it isn’t as easy as that is it?
Sometimes you reach out and it’s taken the wrong way or they let their feelings get in they way of helping you and being there for you. People will always think of themselves and their own feelings first, it’s only natural. So as much as you say “This IS NOT about you” until your blue in the face they will still walk away thinking of themselves and thinking it IS them. Where does that leave you?
You reach out and in the end it’s still about others when for just once for a split second you wanted it to be about you, just so you can get validation and get it off your chest.
What do you do then?
Think about yourself and how you’re feeling, try to narrow the feeling down. Write it down, shake it out, breathe through it and move on. You need to validate it yourself, so sometimes you don’t have to address the person directly in order to move on.
Sometimes the people who you think will be there for you are often the ones that aren’t and vice versa the people who you think won’t be there for you often turn out to be the ones you begin to rely on. That’s the process of life and we have to trust it.
When a challenge comes your way; allow yourself to be mad, angry, frustrated or annoyed. Then ask yourself “What is life trying to teach me now, what lesson can I learn from this?”
In business you will always have the innovative thinkers, the doers and then you have the ones that will take your ideas, not think anything of it and not give reference to you. They don’t understand that joint ventures are a powerful thing if you work together you’ll have double the impact, not if I keep my cards close to my chest I’ll create possibility. But that’s OK because Entrepreneurs have so many ideas and we are not afraid to try them. So we will always be one step ahead….
Unless it has happened to someone then they can never really understand.
I remember when I was young we had a Christmas at our house Aunt’s, Uncle’s, Cousins and Granny (My Mum’s mum) and granny took all of her Grand kids out the front of our house and gave them all money for Christmas….. Except us!
My mum was most upset and it was the main topic of conversation for months, maybe even years. We said to Mum “Don’t worry about it because we don’t care” she would often respond with something like “I don’t care, she doesn’t care about me and I don’t care about her” But of course it did bother her.
I didn’t understand, until it happen to me.
Around 20 years later, seven Grand kids nearly eight. Everyone was at my house and although my Father was not there he sent all Grand kids a present except mine…
I understand now. I try to talk about it and the first thing I say is “I know it’s his loss, his choice, he made that decision” I KNOW that, but it still makes me feel crap.
Do know what everyone still says-
• It’s his loss, don’t let it get to you.
Not that easy, I know that but in that small part of your brain you wonder “Out of 5 kids why me, just one, what’s wrong with me?”
Nothing! His choice or his wife’s but that’s not the point, you have to be accountable. I was made to feel guilty in the last couple of years “Because he tries really hard with me, it’s my fault because I’m a bad daughter”
Maybe I am-
• Because I can’t pretend that you were never there,
• That you only cared when it suited you,
• You left when we needed you most and didn’t even talk about it.
• Sorry those yearly phone calls (if that) didn’t really cut it,
• That you only thought I looked good when I had an eating disorder,
• That my partner whom I love with ALL of my being “Is not good enough for me but good enough for my other sister” What the…. Idiot.
• That in 11 years you have probably called about 5 times (that’s trying really hard).
• When my first daughter was born she was not even acknowledged.
• Even when I have tried to put it behind and start a fresh, reach out you always manage to put me down and patronize me.
Because “Women in business never succeed!”
Some people think that’s funny and maybe it is just you, but I see past that persona for as funny as you maybe and all the guys think you are so funny and such a nice guy. They weren’t there to see what I saw, others maybe able forgive and I have forgiven you as well because I know it’s just you to be selfish and always take the easy way out and that’s OK because you don’t have “it” but your 4 in line does.
With that said I am done and that’s your choice. So I am not mad, angry and I don’t even hate you and from the bottom of my heart I wish you well. But I am done…
Everyone has a limit and I will not feel guilty for being true to myself, honestly and passionately. Those who love you for you will get that.
As soon as it starts to affect your day to day life you must break down your feelings into bit size chewable chucks, process it allow yourself to feel and think and move on.
Is there something that is troubling you, how do you get back on top of it?
Sunny Mummy also has some great advice on seeing life sunny side up :)
Disclaimer: This article was written from a personal opinion and I am NOT a qualified in psychology or counselling. If you do need assistance with emotions or mental health, to seek assistance from your GP immediately.