Wednesday, March 17, 2010
I wrote a post about Reflection & Your Business Mindset but what triggered my thoughts was a discussion we had about Bad Mothers Club and guilt free parenting.
I thought why do we have so much guilt when it comes to being a parent or more specially a Mum?
Upon reflection here is what I think-
1. We hear things like-
a, My kids never had a dummy
b, I only used cloth nappies
c, A good smack never hurt anyone
d, My kids were toilet by the age of 2
So society judges us as to what we 'should' be doing, but do you what?
Whoever has already been through that period of your life that you are experiencing. They think they are perfect, that they were in fact the perfect parent. They forget that sometimes they did feel like
* You were going insane
* You couldn't be bothered to paint/paste or play with your child
* You did just long for some time to yourself
* You did sometimes just lock yourself in room and cry
* You did lose your temper
* You couldn't be bothered cooking a meal
* You did feel alone
2. Guilt by perfection-
When I'm a Mum I'll never...
* I'll only breastfeed
* I'll demand respect
* I'll be so much fun
* I'll be so patient
* I'll always listen
* I'll always cook healthy meals
* I'll never put my child in daycare
* Should I have put my child in daycare
* I'll spend heaps of time with my children
Oh I know I know "I love my kids but...." we know you love your kids but sometimes you wonder-
Where did my life go?
What day is it again?
Sleep what's that?
Me, How am I? Why I don't know no one ever asks.
Reality Is- You are the core of your family, you are what keeps it together, the drop off, the pick up, the chef, the cleaner, the organiser, the breadwinner, the motivator, the counsellor, the partner, the lover, the friend, the disciplinary, the shopper, the bill payer, the money saver and time saver.
So you what! You're not perfect and you'll never be perfect and whoever says they are are full of BS. But what you are is amazing to do what you do and give the way you give, you are nothing short of an inspiration. But give to yourself allow time to yourself just to be....
Upon reflection how do you feel?