Day 3- Of the Love Your Life Challenge

What I would like you to do now is every time someone-
* Upsets you,
* Annoys you, or
* Makes you angry

Write down exactly what it is that made you angry not the person but their action. Continue doing this through the Challenge, keep writing it down because we will re visit this later during the Challenge.

Now we are taking control have you made a cautious decision to think positive? If you are struggling to keep the anxiety at bay there are some tips in this post that will help!

My Spring Day and Style Scene

If you would like to catch more of Bra Queen you can find me at

My Spring Day- Online Personal Trainers and inspiring you to achieve a balanced lifestyle.

Style Scene- The ultimate women's resource centre, it's really cool.

Day 2- Love Your Life Challenge, Domestic Violence

Guest Post- My Story on Domestic Violence

I had to break the cycle and stop the war because I'd had enough
When I was a teenager I watched my Mum get physically abused. It was usually on weekends and alcohol was always the instigator. He was unbelievably quiet when he was sober but when he had a few drinks in him he become very violent.
He would head butt my mum, throw her against cars, throw her up against walls you name it.
My brother and I would watch so scared and I was older so I would always stop it somehow.
I hated the next day the awkwardness that we all felt. I couldn’t look him in the eye and I just had to put up with it and pretend it didn’t happen. No one knew this was going on in my house not even my closest friends.

Although I couldn’t understand why my Mum kept putting up with it, I was old enough to know and I understood that she needed someone.

He then started to become violent with my brother and I, but I am not going to go into that.
When I finished school I left home and moved quite far away. I was really scared to leave because I didn’t know what would happen to my brother and my Mum because in so many ways I was the strong one and I always stopped it.
Eventually they split up I don’t know why but I am glad they did.

As I was working hard and saving money so I could put myself through College. When I was 18 years old I meet a guy that for some reason caught my eye. I just remember telling my friend “I think I like him” and she said “BUT HE HAS TATTOOS” I said “I know but look at his smile!”
We eventually got together and lived together. I knew he drank a lot but that was kind of the town we lived in as well. But I soon found out that he was quite violent not with me but with other people when he was drinking. Always getting into fights but it was always the other guys fault.
Then on my 19th Birthday we were out celebrating and my mum was up so I was filming a band for her and he walked past me and elbowed me in the arm. When I looked he said I was flirting with a guy and when I looked at the guy he was about 80 years old!

Then one night I we were suppose to go out together but he come home so drunk that he couldn’t. When I said I was still going out he said “No! you are not” and I said “What’s good for the goose is good for the gender” WELL!

He came flying at me and he beat me to an absolute pulp to !
I ran out and I was walking and hiding when every car drove past. I saw him driving the streets looking for me. A friend come and picked me up and instantly I was playing it down.
The next day he come to me and was ever so remorseful, crying saying I was the best thing that ever happened to him and he would NEVER do it again and he didn’t know what came over him.
He did do it again and continued to do it again. BUT
He had a good side and boy that good side was the best! Funny, charming, creative and ambitious and I just thought that if I could help him through it we’d would be OK.

The worst time was when I tried to break up with him and he told me he would commit suicide (he didn’t say it that nicely) if I did. When I pleaded with him he got really angry, I was sitting outside and he raced over to me grabbed me by the throat and picked me up (still holding me by the throat) and I was literally just dangling as he was holding me. (I just realised that I STILL say holding, he was STRANGLING me) Luckily my house mate come home and when she seen what was happening she stopped him and she told me to go inside and she ever so calmly said “I think you better go” and he did.
She came into the bathroom where I was curled up into a ball struggling to breathe because he’s been strangling me for a while. She put her arm around me and said nothing just held me.

To you a say THANK YOU!

But I STILL went back! Because why? I told you he was charming he knew what to say and when to say it and I thought I had no where or no one to turn too.
Until one night it happened again and he left, then I left. I left no note, nothing! I never cried I just left and moved on.

You here people say “I would just leave, I wouldn’t put up with that” You don’t know what you are going to do until you are in that situation.
Now I know this-
I was just a girl who thought she was an adult and although I knew it was wrong it was the only love I had known for a really long time. I was scared and I thought I had no where to turn. I didn’t know any different, I had no where to go and no one to turn too. But you know what? I did and you do and anywhere is better then there.

I left and promised myself that I would NEVER let that happen again. When I looked in the mirror there was new determination, new self confidence and new self respect. I would do it on my own!
And I did, and then someone walked into my life that loves me and adores me because I gave myself permission to be loved the way everyone is supposed to be loved.

Domestic Violence Facts:
•50% of women in their CURRENT relationship have been abused by her partner at least once.
•Only 12% of them call the police, the others admit living in fear (I never did, but I should have because later in his life he REALLY hurt someone they nearly died. He needed help)
•20.8% of all homicides involve intimate partners. This represents approximately 76 homicide incidents within Australia each year.

Everyone has a trigger, a point that they get too where enough is enough. It may not be physical abuse it may be verbal or sexual. But you can only do something when you are ready and you have the strength. But there is always an out and only you can make it happen.
If you don’t feel comfortable getting “help” read You Can Heal You Life by the amazing Louise Hay and go from there.

Domestic Violence Resource Site
Domestic Violence Prevention Centre

Love Your Life Challenge

My interview on The Love Your Life Challenge

Jade Craven
I spoke to Renee about the AMAZING love your life challenge she is doing next month. I am SO honoured to be part of it. Recorded on April 24, 2009

Watch @braqueen

Day 1- Of the Love Your Life Challenge

Today we are going to write a list organizing our week. Good time management is crucial. If you organize your mind you won’t be easily stressed.
Think about everything you need/want to fit into your week:
My list-
1.Exercise- I want to train 4 times a week
2.Shopping- Groceries, Errands
3.Spending time with the kids- I have 2 kids under 3 so at the moment one word DEMANDING!
4.Me time-I do my beauty regime. It's a small thing that you can do that just makes you feel good and you're looking after yourself.
5.Work- As Bra Queen I wear many hats so my work is never actually complete. I need to prioritize my work according to my deadlines.
6.Partner time-Every night I try to make time for one hour where I can just sit with Chris and well I was going to say chat but mostly it’s me chatting and him listening (maybe he’s listening)
7.Housework- I do 1 major clean a week then just bits in between.

My biggest aim is to try to enjoy and embrace everyday.

There is heaps of other “stuff” I need to do but I can work them in to wherever and obviously it’s changes week to week.

Mine is going to be as follows:

Monday- I like making sure I exercise on a Monday because it prepares and motivates me for the week. I also prepare my working week everything I need to do. Washing is usually on the list after the weekend! The girls sleep at 1pm and this is when I work. I usually iron once the girls go down at 7pm.

Tuesday- Is my exercise, work & spend time with the girls day. I go for my walk then on the way home I go the park so Maddison can have a run around as well. I work in the morning then again when the girls go down at 1pm. The rest of the time I try to spend being as proactive with the girls as possible as it is really our only day that we are not running around like mad people.

Wednesday- I work and I also look after Maddie’s boyfriend. Maddison isn’t in care I think it’s important that she still interacts with kids her own age.

Thursday- Is my housework day, grocery shopping day and work day. So this is a pretty crazy day for the girls and I it’s a bit of a whirlwind day. But I like to be super organized for the weekend.

Friday- Is me day! YAY, the girls are with Nan and Pa by half 9. This is where I spend ½ hour on ME doing my weekly beauty regime, then I work, work, work until the girls get home at 5pm.
Friday night once the girls are in bed at 7pm our “thing” is to sit down with a yummy cheese platter and have a drink together and chill out.

I encourage you to just do something nice at the end of the week with your partner, just so you can relax and have a laugh together. If you don’t have a partner do something you enjoy or spend it with someone who makes you feel good.

Weekends my checklist is done, except exercise so at least 1 workout is needed. But other then that I am sorted!


How did you go, did you fit everything in?

This weeks PRIZES Include-
* A luxurious treatment Oceana Day Spa,
* SPROUT The Life You Love ,
* Pep+Coddle Stationary Set and Voucher,
* Mum e Assistant Health and Well Being Journal

AreYou Ready?

Today I just want to say this-

You HAVE to make the decision to BE 100% because

Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty, and each action will be meaningless. Truth, honesty and confidence are the roots of happiness...
Trust that if you enjoy something that is what matters and as soon as you don’t stop and reassess. Follow your heart and you will be making the right decision it is that simple.

I trust you and I believe in you.
Make that commitment to BE 100% YOU xxx

We start Love Your Life on Monday! Bring it on!!!

Some days will be easier then others and some days through out the challenge may benefit you more, I encourage you to be persistent and consistent everyday!

GIVEAWAYS WILL BE HANDED OUT EVERY WEEK TO THOSE WHO ARE SHARING THEIR STORIES AND PROGRESS BY COMMENTING IN THE COMMENTS SECTION ON EACH POST.
2 MAJOR PRIZES WILL BE GIVEN OUT IN THE LAST WEEK.